Post by K-Box on Jan 7, 2009 19:30:42 GMT -8
Porn industry seeks federal bailout
WASHINGTON (CNN) — Another major American industry is asking for assistance as the global financial crisis continues: Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said Wednesday they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry.
“The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three,” said Owen Moogan, spokesman for Larry Flynt. “The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine.”
Francis said in a statement that “the US government should actively support the adult industry's survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people."
“We should be delivering [the request] by the end of today to our congressmen and [Secretary of the Treasury Henry] Paulson asking for this $5 billion dollar bailout,” he told CNN Wednesday.
Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow.
But the industry leaders said the issue is a nation in need. "People are too depressed to be sexually active," Flynt said in the statement. "This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex."
"With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It's time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly."
So far, there has been no congressional reaction to the request.
I'm stunned by how many people are not only taking Flynt seriously, but also taking this as a sign that the adult entertainment industry is in financial trouble, even though Flynt and his people have all but flat-out stated that neither one of these is the case.
For fuck's sake, people, this is the same guy who gave us Nailin' Paylin; short of appearing before Congress and having Rick Astley perform Goatse live on C-SPAN, how much more evidence do you need that everything Larry says or does is symptomatic of his being a huge gigantic attention whore and an epic IRL troll?
That being said, the fact remains that the adult entertainment industry is the ONLY American industry that would either a) actually pay the government BACK, or b) actually deliver something of VALUE in return for the government's investment ... as opposed to, you know, giving platinum parachutes to the already grossly overpaid executives whose literally criminal levels of corruption and incompetence got us into this mess in the first place, or else simply "MISPLACING" the money, without a trace, to the tune of BILLIONS of dollars of it at a time, as the "legitimate" businesses involved have already done.
In fact, fuck the bailout; in Bill Richardson's absence, I hereby nominate Larry Flynt for Secretary of Commerce, because he's one of the few free-market capitalists out there who actually knows what the fuck he's doing.
WASHINGTON (CNN) — Another major American industry is asking for assistance as the global financial crisis continues: Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said Wednesday they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry.
“The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three,” said Owen Moogan, spokesman for Larry Flynt. “The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine.”
Francis said in a statement that “the US government should actively support the adult industry's survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people."
“We should be delivering [the request] by the end of today to our congressmen and [Secretary of the Treasury Henry] Paulson asking for this $5 billion dollar bailout,” he told CNN Wednesday.
Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow.
But the industry leaders said the issue is a nation in need. "People are too depressed to be sexually active," Flynt said in the statement. "This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex."
"With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It's time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly."
So far, there has been no congressional reaction to the request.
I'm stunned by how many people are not only taking Flynt seriously, but also taking this as a sign that the adult entertainment industry is in financial trouble, even though Flynt and his people have all but flat-out stated that neither one of these is the case.
For fuck's sake, people, this is the same guy who gave us Nailin' Paylin; short of appearing before Congress and having Rick Astley perform Goatse live on C-SPAN, how much more evidence do you need that everything Larry says or does is symptomatic of his being a huge gigantic attention whore and an epic IRL troll?
That being said, the fact remains that the adult entertainment industry is the ONLY American industry that would either a) actually pay the government BACK, or b) actually deliver something of VALUE in return for the government's investment ... as opposed to, you know, giving platinum parachutes to the already grossly overpaid executives whose literally criminal levels of corruption and incompetence got us into this mess in the first place, or else simply "MISPLACING" the money, without a trace, to the tune of BILLIONS of dollars of it at a time, as the "legitimate" businesses involved have already done.
In fact, fuck the bailout; in Bill Richardson's absence, I hereby nominate Larry Flynt for Secretary of Commerce, because he's one of the few free-market capitalists out there who actually knows what the fuck he's doing.